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Andrey Arshavin Was A Russian Spy

July 11, 2013 | Filed under: epl news, Europe and tagged with: andrey arshavin, arsenal, kremlin, MI5, MI6, mother russia, NSA, pavel pogrebnyak, reading, roman pavlyuchenko, russian, secret agent, spy
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Andrei-Arshavin was a Russian double agent not a footballer(By Greg Thomson)

Leaked NSA documents have revealed that former Arsenal player, Andrey Arshavin, was actually a Russian Spy.

Arshavin, code-name ‘Red Fox’, was the brainchild of Kremlin chief Sergei Rachmaninoff, who funded his agent’s training as a footballer, and pulled strings to include him in the Zenit St. Petersburg team.

As a result of these revelations, the Russian International has now retreated back to his homeland, and is reportedly worried about his safety.

There are also suspicions that Arshavin’s rumored move to Barcelona, around the time of his Arsenal transfer, was in fact dis-information created by Moscow, used to further sell Red Fox’s cover story to the Brits.

Arsenal fans will remember the forward’s injury spells, however it is now thought that this was merely a ploy to allow the agent more time to gather valuable intelligence in and around the nation’s capital.

British Intelligence are also liaising with the French Secret Service as they try to ascertain whether or not Arsene Wenger was a part of the Ruskies’ plot.

It has also been confirmed that fellow Russians, Roman Pavlyuchenko and Pavel Pogrebnyak, are fellow Kremlin spies, sent to England in the hope of assisting Arshavin’s espionage, and ultimately, aiding in his escape.

 

 

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Written by Greg Thomson

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33 Responses to "Andrey Arshavin Was A Russian Spy"

  1. Frambo Gallen says:
    July 25, 2013 at 8:11 pm

    Arshavin … A Real Spy ‘HAVIN a laugh!

    Reply
  2. Rxn says:
    July 26, 2013 at 10:13 am

    Oh, there can not be such

    Reply
  3. Nick Smith says:
    July 26, 2013 at 11:17 am

    There is a lot of truth in this. In the Latchford Files, recently released under the 30-Year-Rule, it was revealed that the Soviet Union deliberately targeted English football. Indeed, there is evidence to suggest that England’s failure to qualify for a number of World Cups, notably in 1974, 1978 and 1994, was down to KGB/Soviet infiltration of leading First Division clubs, the higher echelons of the FA and the FA School at Lilleshall.

    Leading members of the footballing establishment are implicated in the files, which give detailed information on the KGB’s recruiting activities in what became known as “Concerto No. 2 in C minor”, a complex operation to undermine and diminish England as a power in world football. Among the decisions directly implicated in the scandal are the choice of Don Revie over Brian Clough, the short-lived England career of Matt Le Tissier and the “Greenwood Question”, relating the mysterious decision to drop Glenn Hoddle after his impressive debut against Bulgaria on 22nd, November, 1979.

    I’m sure there is a lot more to come on this.

    Reply
    1. Shahrukh says:
      August 14, 2013 at 7:01 pm

      So, the KGB was also behind England’s failure to qualify for Euro 2008 I guess???????????

      Reply
      1. Nick Smith says:
        August 15, 2013 at 10:43 am

        In a word – yes. The England football team is one of the KGB’s successes. It ranks up there with getting Kim Philby appointed head of stationery. How else can you explain the presence of Phil Neal and Emlyn Hughes in the England team or the almost devotional attitude to Bryan Robson?

        Reply
  4. Artyom Zausaylov (@Zausaylov) says:
    July 28, 2013 at 11:16 am

    This is the most stupid thing I have read today. From Russia with love.

    Reply
  5. Smith says:
    July 30, 2013 at 10:38 am

    LOL Great news

    Reply
  6. Dhruv says:
    August 13, 2013 at 9:23 pm

    i knew this…

    Reply
  7. Eric mwangi says:
    August 14, 2013 at 5:02 am

    i really don’t know what to believe, but this is kinda funny

    Reply
  8. veljko says:
    August 14, 2013 at 10:04 am

    hahahahaha :D

    Reply
  9. Jatrius says:
    August 14, 2013 at 11:46 am

    Loving the comments from the simpletons taking this seriously. ‘Red Fox’ and Dom Joly, anyone?

    Reply
  10. Callum says:
    August 14, 2013 at 12:28 pm

    Why the fuck did I just read….

    Reply
  11. AJ says:
    August 14, 2013 at 12:31 pm

    Thanks for the entertainment. Made my day.

    Reply
  12. Dicky says:
    August 14, 2013 at 1:03 pm

    In other news, Didier Drogba’s brief stint in China was an intelligence mission assigned by the much respected Ivory Coast Secret Service.

    Reply
  13. Marshman says:
    August 14, 2013 at 1:31 pm

    That accounts for it. He was always hanging around on Kensington Palace Gardens when I was setting up my stall.

    Reply
  14. JJ says:
    August 14, 2013 at 1:47 pm

    In other news, former Chelsea goalkeeper, Carlo Cudicini, was a runaway prisoner from Egypt

    Reply
  15. Shamy Khan says:
    August 14, 2013 at 2:21 pm

    so it means don`t buy a Russian player … :p

    Reply
  16. melvin says:
    August 14, 2013 at 2:48 pm

    now i know why abrahmovic bought chelsea!

    Reply
  17. Edgar says:
    August 14, 2013 at 3:08 pm

    This is bullshit! Anyways with the Russians anything is possible

    Reply
  18. Raza says:
    August 14, 2013 at 3:39 pm

    worst article i have ever seen…what a bullshit…

    Reply
  19. chakriya says:
    August 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm

    emember the “spy next door”? the russian spy kind of looked like him

    Reply
  20. Adrian says:
    August 14, 2013 at 4:40 pm

    I really think this is true, but then again, what a load of bull… If this is true, then what about Gervinho

    Reply
  21. Caolan says:
    August 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm

    Who cares, he was shit anyway

    Reply
  22. mahad says:
    August 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm

    hahaha what a stupid article ,any way it sounds funny

    Reply
  23. mutari says:
    August 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm

    d media this days is full of shit….. u tink u can just com up with anytin cos ppl giv u listenin ears….. to hell wit u

    Reply
  24. John Doe says:
    August 14, 2013 at 6:55 pm

    You do know this ‘football news’ website is not a real one, its a parody one similar to ‘Onion news’ another parody station.

    Reply
  25. Hugh Jassol says:
    August 14, 2013 at 8:52 pm

    Jeezus Christ, you people takin this seriously are either morons or have 0 sense of humour….lightern up, chill out, go light a joint!

    Reply
  26. shasss says:
    August 14, 2013 at 9:21 pm

    I almost believed until i saw wenger
    wtf are you havin a laugh

    Reply
  27. shakiib says:
    August 14, 2013 at 9:28 pm

    it was going well until you included wenger in youre crazy concpiracy theory

    Reply
  28. sollylollyman says:
    August 15, 2013 at 11:10 am

    Not since the Flying Deckchair was a Highbury has some much be expected from so little by so many.

    Reply
  29. tom crusicky says:
    August 18, 2013 at 11:31 am

    looks unbelievable ,but after some concideration,looks quiet possible,unfotunately.Remember a story about ” real U.S. families,turn out to be russian’s spies.

    Reply
  30. Bambang says:
    August 21, 2013 at 2:05 pm

    so he is benched all this time so he can report intels and keeping low profile?

    Reply
    1. Harold Labbé says:
      September 2, 2013 at 1:41 am

      Ha- ha-ha!What esle can I say?

      Reply

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