Despite scoring the winning goal in Saturday’s Champions League final, the German giants revealed that they have never liked the player and don’t care whether he lives or dies.
A club spokesperson confirmed that they are delighted to get rid of the Holland International.
“Look, we know he is a great talent and helped us on the pitch, but that’s simply not good enough.
“Will his goal and contribution in the final be remembered for a long time? I have serious doubts.”
Rumours have persisted for a while that Robben’s performances were embarrassing the rest of the squad, who colluded with the club to have the winger forcibly removed from his home in the middle of the night.
Indeed, after Robben arrived home from celebrating Bayern’s fifth European Cup victory, swat teams descended on his house and attacked his family.
The player was bound, gagged and water boarded until he signed documents which mean he is legally no longer the person he used to be.
A source close to Robben has suggested that he will now find work as a floor sweeper in a public bathroom.
“Arjen is obviously very hurt about what happened. He was of course thrilled about the outcome of the Champions League final, but is now upset that his life has been taken away from him for no apparent reason.”