According to a struck off Swiss surgeon and gigantic heroin addict, Dr Ruben Van Krautencock, the English club has consulted with him about the procedure.
He said: “They want Joe Hart eliminated from society, but they also want everyone who has ever loved him extradited for encouraging such a mediocre talent.
“Generally I deal with society’s bottom dwellers – drug dealers, money lenders – so overpaid footballers is a natural progression.”
City manager Manuel Pellegrini confirmed he hopes his goalkeeper will burn in hell for all eternity.
He said: ” When I first arrived at the club, I thought Joe was a joke – a prank to celebrate my arrival in a new job.
“But I quickly realised I was supposed to play him, even though watching him in goal is like seeing the personification of all man’s sins wrapped up in fleshy sack of consciousness.”