Ego maniac Mourinho confirmed he does not possess enough self awareness to understand the irony of the situation.
He said: “If there is no one thing I hate, it’s people who complain.
“I also despise people who are over confident and originate from Portugal.”
A spokesperson for Chelsea revealed that the former Porto boss was raised by over bearing parents who have inadvertently created a monster.
“Jose is like one of those stage kids who piss and moan about everything because they think the world evolves around them….a bit like Hitler but without the wit or dashing good looks.”