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You are here: Home › epl news › Newcastle Appoint Mr Blobby As Youth Team Coach
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Newcastle Appoint Mr Blobby As Youth Team Coach

October 24, 2013 | Filed under: epl news and tagged with: Alan Pardew, Joe Kinnear, Mike Ashley, Mr Blobby, newcastle, newcastle owner, newcastle united, Noel's house party
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mr blobby appointed newcastle youth team coachSporting embarrassment Newcastle United have charged novelty buffoon Mr Blobby with developing their future talent.

Rotund owner Mike Ashley, who once employed a dead raccoon to baby sit his children, has had a sexual interest in the former Noel’s House Party guest for many years now.

But, Ashley insisted his steamy romance with Blobby will not interfere with the running of the football club.

He said: “It’s true that I love Blobby and intend to take his hand in marriage.

Alan Pardew disgusted by Mr Blobby appointment

Pardew’s time on Earth coming to an end

“However, that shouldn’t detract from his obvious talents. He will also help shower and bathe Director of Football Joe Kinnear in the mornings.”

Asked what manager Alan Pardew thinks of the appointment, Ashley responded: “Alan has already heavily researched the legalities of taking his own life. The club, along with Mr Blobby, will support him in his decision.”

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Written by Mark Hodge

Mark is the publisher, editor and media friendly face of EPL Wire. Not that you can see his face, but trust me, it is friendly and in no way disfigured.

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