The Columbian striker made the revelation after turning down some of the tops clubs in Europe.
But, the former Atletico Madrid player insists that the millions of tax free oil soaked Euros was not a factor in joining up with the footballing non-entity.
He said: “I like the fact that they only have an average attendance of 5,000. That means I’ll be producing my best work but nobody will see it. A bit like Van Gogh or Jerry Lewis.”
Indeed, Monaco is the football club equivalent of Paris Hilton; it looks good on paper, has loads of money, but in reality doesn’t do anything.
The club, which is nestled within the principality where no one actually lives but just pretends to for tax purposes, has recently been bought by Russian billionaire Dmitry Rybolovlev.
And, just like any oil rich oligarch from the former Communist state, Rybolovlev likes to throw his money around like an attention starved monkey with handfuls of shit.
Joining the unambitious Falcao are fellow mercenaries João Moutinho and James Rodríguez , who joined for an eye-watering £60-million from Porto, which now acts as a kind of Harrods for the footballing nouveau rich.
A Monaco club spokesperson confirmed they are happy to have such soulless footballers gracing their artificial club in an artificial part of the world that no one cares about.
“We want players without any principles, whose loyalty to us will be lost the minute they sign their lucrative contracts. That’s the way we like to do things around here.”