Ravel Morrison Has The Self Esteem Of An Overweight Goth
Despite looking and acting evil, Morrison has refuted claims that he is
Dysfunctional waste of life Ravel Morrison has admitted that he is not a nice person after being questioned by police.
The West Ham fuck space was arrested over allegedly assaulting two women who accused him of being descended from the evil rabbits from Watership Down.
A source within the police confirmed that Morrison is a fascinating case, simply because he is a millionaire who continually breaks the law for no reason.
The source said: “We had him analysed by a doctor who concluded that inside Ravel feels like 
an overweight goth girl who enjoys self harming because she is a massive non-conformist weirdo.”
Morrison has denied reports that he held an entire retirement home hostage and made the elderly residents listen to N-Dubz while the former Manchester United starlet fellated himself in the corner.
What Ravel Morrison feels like inside
Hammers boss Sam Alladyce confirmed to EPL Wire that Morrison makes Oscar Pistorius look like a normal functioning member of society, and not a violent cry baby who has gym equipment attached to his soon to be redundant body unit.
He said: “Coaching Ravel is a bit like battling dick cancer….that’s it….that’s all I have to say….the kid is like dick cancer.”
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